Main School
April 12, 2014
What it Means to Be A Black Belt
A Reflection on Over 25 years in Tae Kwon Do.
What does it mean to be a black belt? This is a question that has been to every black belt before they test for their temporary black belt and each person tends to have a different answer. Some answers I have found interesting over the years, but the reality is that until you become a black belt one doesn’t know what it means. And if a person is truly a black belt that answer changes over time. I know for me the meaning has changed greatly from when I got my black belt in the fourth grade and what it means today as a man who is about to turn 33 years old. I know that over my life I have tried to hide this fact for reasons I will discuss further later in this essay, but one cannot hide they are a black belt forever.
Does a pee-wee really know what it means to be a black belt? This is a question I find myself asking myself now after over 25 years of study. When I began learning the martial arts in 1987 it was during the Karate Kid fad that lasted for a couple of years, so like many children I wanted to be just like him. But I was no karate kid and I had little understanding of life given my relatively short time on this earth. So, when I began writing my essay for my black belt in the third grade, I struggled to come up with what being a black belt meant to me. I simply didn’t have the life experience to write such a paper and so my essay was a hodgepodge items thrown together, which didn’t offer much in terms of substance. For me it was simply a natural progression from the age of 6 until the third grade. And I will admit that my parents held me back a period of over a year until they felt I was ready. And I have seen many pee-wee black belts that truly didn’t understand what it meant including myself to a certain degree, but there are countless adult that didn’t either. No one is truly ready for being a black belt until they realize what the title really involves. So, what does a black belt mean early on and throughout one’s life?
Being a black belt has always been an honor and a responsibility. As a black belt you are given an honor of knowledge that has been passed down through the ages that few people will ever have the opportunity to learn. Along with this honor you have the responsibility to set the tone. By setting the tone I mean that it is important to set an example for others whether it is through volunteering, being a teacher in the dojang or even teaching others outside of the dojang based on your own personal knowledge. It is a big deal. It is not something for the light of heart or people that want to use it for glory. Glory to a black belt should be to pass on one’s knowledge to others not through fancy movies or by showing off how many bricks one can break. A black belt must realize that eventually the applause goes away and that all glory is fleeting as the Romans used to say. Given that I have arthritis in both my hands I learned that the applause dissipates quickly later than I should have. But during my life what it means to be a black has truly evolved from this basic meaning.
As a teenager I obtained the rank of second dan and I thought that I was Mr. Black Belt. I broke more concrete than any teenager should be allowed, which is my fault. I used my skills to teach young children that drug abuse was not the road that they should go down. But during that time I got addicted to the applause I received. If you put two or three concrete bricks in front I would break them. I even broke three bricks using an axe kick during the halftime of high school basketball game in front of 10,000 people. The pressure of this didn’t even come into my mind and I pulled it off to the loudest applause I have received in my life. But over time I found that I had become a side show act and that is not what being a black belt is about. I slowly began backing away from any label related to my status as a black belt and by the time I entered college no one even knew about it unless someone asked me about it.
I simply wanted to let that part of my life be in the past. I literally tried to run away from being a black belt. And like everything a person runs away from something they are eventually forced to face the issue head on. Over the next decade I did a pretty good job of hiding my secret until I got into politics. Immediately, people noticed that I was different from the average person in politics. I had one Marine ask me if I had been in the service and I told him no. And he said there is something different about you and I said I studied martial arts as kid and teenager. He said that I gave off a vibe that was different than most people who are civilians. And in many ways I see what he is saying more clearly now.
The reality is that once you are a black belt and if you truly believe in the concepts that you have learned the belt becomes part of you. It is almost like a vital organ within you that affects your mind, heart, body, soul or indomitable spirit and even your own actions. I find that even though my skills have been diminished due to back surgery seven years ago, my black belt is still a part of me. It is represented in everything I am and that I do. There have been many times that people have tried to buy me with jobs and even a money clip full of money, but I resisted the temptation because a black belt cannot be bought. I didn’t buy my black belt and I earned it the hard way through a lot of blood, sweat, tears, broken bones and a couple bruises here or there. Once you are truly a black belt people cannot buy you, because there is no price tag one’s integrity.
At 33 years old I have found that the skills I have acquired through the martial arts have helped me deal with my back injury. Even though my skills will never return the level at which they were when I was in high school, I have found that my mind is a lot clearer now, which makes up for this. I find that my mind is well-tuned then it was previously. During an epidural, I was able to focus my mind away from the pain to the point that I didn’t even feel the needles as they entered my back without the aid of painkillers. When I was asked later how many times they had inserted the needle into my back I said that I didn’t know. I had literally used my own my mind to relax my body to the point I felt no pain. I know that I wouldn’t have been able to do this without my experience in the martial arts. The martial arts have definitely improved my mind and my ability to focus as you can see, but the effect spiritual is the greatest gift of all.
Spiritually, being an adult black belt is a state of being. Literally, I find that it is part of my soul and it can be seen in everything I do. Many people have stated that I am a lot older than my years and that they are always learning something new from me. And in many ways I feel that physically my body is older than that of the average 33 year old, but this experience has made me a lot wiser. I am able to visualize things a lot faster and I can anticipate things before they happen because of being a black belt. Being able to visualize things cannot be learned overnight though and it has come from years of sparring and meditation. But as a pee-wee I never had these skills, because I lacked the experience that comes with a diverse life experience.
What it means to be a black belt evolves over time. And in many ways after a person becomes a black belt they slowly become real. Being a black belt effects a person in ways that they will never truly understand. I find that in my life being a black belt has changed who I am for the better and it helped me become more real. It reminds me of following tract from the book The Velveteen Rabbit below:
“What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"
"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."
"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.
"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."
"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"
"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."
"I suppose you are real?" said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse might be sensitive.
But the Skin Horse only smiled.”
Like the story of the Velveteen Rabbit as a young black belt I didn’t know what it meant to be real or to be black belt until I got much older. Today, like the Velveteen Rabbit my hair is slowly disappearing, my eye sight is growing worse, my joints creak and crack when I move and my back has been greatly weakened. When I wake up in the morning I hear crack, snap and pop and that is not my breakfast cereal, that is the sound my body makes as I move in the morning. But all of those symptoms of growing older don’t matter to me. Today as I accept my body’s limitations I have finally come close to understanding what it truly means to be a black belt and how it has affected my life. Once a black belt always a black belt; no matter what you do it will never leave you.
A Reflection on Over 25 years in Tae Kwon Do.
What does it mean to be a black belt? This is a question that has been to every black belt before they test for their temporary black belt and each person tends to have a different answer. Some answers I have found interesting over the years, but the reality is that until you become a black belt one doesn’t know what it means. And if a person is truly a black belt that answer changes over time. I know for me the meaning has changed greatly from when I got my black belt in the fourth grade and what it means today as a man who is about to turn 33 years old. I know that over my life I have tried to hide this fact for reasons I will discuss further later in this essay, but one cannot hide they are a black belt forever.
Does a pee-wee really know what it means to be a black belt? This is a question I find myself asking myself now after over 25 years of study. When I began learning the martial arts in 1987 it was during the Karate Kid fad that lasted for a couple of years, so like many children I wanted to be just like him. But I was no karate kid and I had little understanding of life given my relatively short time on this earth. So, when I began writing my essay for my black belt in the third grade, I struggled to come up with what being a black belt meant to me. I simply didn’t have the life experience to write such a paper and so my essay was a hodgepodge items thrown together, which didn’t offer much in terms of substance. For me it was simply a natural progression from the age of 6 until the third grade. And I will admit that my parents held me back a period of over a year until they felt I was ready. And I have seen many pee-wee black belts that truly didn’t understand what it meant including myself to a certain degree, but there are countless adult that didn’t either. No one is truly ready for being a black belt until they realize what the title really involves. So, what does a black belt mean early on and throughout one’s life?
Being a black belt has always been an honor and a responsibility. As a black belt you are given an honor of knowledge that has been passed down through the ages that few people will ever have the opportunity to learn. Along with this honor you have the responsibility to set the tone. By setting the tone I mean that it is important to set an example for others whether it is through volunteering, being a teacher in the dojang or even teaching others outside of the dojang based on your own personal knowledge. It is a big deal. It is not something for the light of heart or people that want to use it for glory. Glory to a black belt should be to pass on one’s knowledge to others not through fancy movies or by showing off how many bricks one can break. A black belt must realize that eventually the applause goes away and that all glory is fleeting as the Romans used to say. Given that I have arthritis in both my hands I learned that the applause dissipates quickly later than I should have. But during my life what it means to be a black has truly evolved from this basic meaning.
As a teenager I obtained the rank of second dan and I thought that I was Mr. Black Belt. I broke more concrete than any teenager should be allowed, which is my fault. I used my skills to teach young children that drug abuse was not the road that they should go down. But during that time I got addicted to the applause I received. If you put two or three concrete bricks in front I would break them. I even broke three bricks using an axe kick during the halftime of high school basketball game in front of 10,000 people. The pressure of this didn’t even come into my mind and I pulled it off to the loudest applause I have received in my life. But over time I found that I had become a side show act and that is not what being a black belt is about. I slowly began backing away from any label related to my status as a black belt and by the time I entered college no one even knew about it unless someone asked me about it.
I simply wanted to let that part of my life be in the past. I literally tried to run away from being a black belt. And like everything a person runs away from something they are eventually forced to face the issue head on. Over the next decade I did a pretty good job of hiding my secret until I got into politics. Immediately, people noticed that I was different from the average person in politics. I had one Marine ask me if I had been in the service and I told him no. And he said there is something different about you and I said I studied martial arts as kid and teenager. He said that I gave off a vibe that was different than most people who are civilians. And in many ways I see what he is saying more clearly now.
The reality is that once you are a black belt and if you truly believe in the concepts that you have learned the belt becomes part of you. It is almost like a vital organ within you that affects your mind, heart, body, soul or indomitable spirit and even your own actions. I find that even though my skills have been diminished due to back surgery seven years ago, my black belt is still a part of me. It is represented in everything I am and that I do. There have been many times that people have tried to buy me with jobs and even a money clip full of money, but I resisted the temptation because a black belt cannot be bought. I didn’t buy my black belt and I earned it the hard way through a lot of blood, sweat, tears, broken bones and a couple bruises here or there. Once you are truly a black belt people cannot buy you, because there is no price tag one’s integrity.
At 33 years old I have found that the skills I have acquired through the martial arts have helped me deal with my back injury. Even though my skills will never return the level at which they were when I was in high school, I have found that my mind is a lot clearer now, which makes up for this. I find that my mind is well-tuned then it was previously. During an epidural, I was able to focus my mind away from the pain to the point that I didn’t even feel the needles as they entered my back without the aid of painkillers. When I was asked later how many times they had inserted the needle into my back I said that I didn’t know. I had literally used my own my mind to relax my body to the point I felt no pain. I know that I wouldn’t have been able to do this without my experience in the martial arts. The martial arts have definitely improved my mind and my ability to focus as you can see, but the effect spiritual is the greatest gift of all.
Spiritually, being an adult black belt is a state of being. Literally, I find that it is part of my soul and it can be seen in everything I do. Many people have stated that I am a lot older than my years and that they are always learning something new from me. And in many ways I feel that physically my body is older than that of the average 33 year old, but this experience has made me a lot wiser. I am able to visualize things a lot faster and I can anticipate things before they happen because of being a black belt. Being able to visualize things cannot be learned overnight though and it has come from years of sparring and meditation. But as a pee-wee I never had these skills, because I lacked the experience that comes with a diverse life experience.
What it means to be a black belt evolves over time. And in many ways after a person becomes a black belt they slowly become real. Being a black belt effects a person in ways that they will never truly understand. I find that in my life being a black belt has changed who I am for the better and it helped me become more real. It reminds me of following tract from the book The Velveteen Rabbit below:
“What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"
"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."
"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.
"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."
"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"
"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."
"I suppose you are real?" said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse might be sensitive.
But the Skin Horse only smiled.”
Like the story of the Velveteen Rabbit as a young black belt I didn’t know what it meant to be real or to be black belt until I got much older. Today, like the Velveteen Rabbit my hair is slowly disappearing, my eye sight is growing worse, my joints creak and crack when I move and my back has been greatly weakened. When I wake up in the morning I hear crack, snap and pop and that is not my breakfast cereal, that is the sound my body makes as I move in the morning. But all of those symptoms of growing older don’t matter to me. Today as I accept my body’s limitations I have finally come close to understanding what it truly means to be a black belt and how it has affected my life. Once a black belt always a black belt; no matter what you do it will never leave you.
